Gym locker room etiquette

I decided this year to spend more time in the torture box ......swearing to be committed to a punishing monday -thurs routine at the gym with Faith ...my trainer not my doberman but they share interesting similar vocal qualities
Slowly but surely I realised that though the gym is still the bastion of the alpha male or preening peacock who struts and glances slyly at the mirror to check his new biceps or flattening bellies but it was home to some of the most appaling social behaviour seen since high school.
Am trying not to over analyse this but lay out the simple code of conduct ….etente cordial so to speak

Don'ts

- Walk through a crowded locker room without saying hello ...this shows your breeding
- Engage in conversation with a total stranger while he is naked totally pervy
- Wander around the locker room en flagrante ..... this is not the remake caligula
- Dont flex ur pecs in the bathroom , powder ur ass or any thing suitably arousing to those interested

Do
- Pick up your wet towel and put in the dry cleaning bin
- Do tip the locker room attendant or one day that rolex may walk away
- Do keep conversation of deals, conquest and general loutish ways to a minimum
- Do not pick on people with more physical imperfectios than you .....yours may all be in your head

This is exhausting......................... gotta go find faith …. I can hear her yelling

Comments

Popular Posts